Learning to Be Happy

Deserving can sound like a pretty selfish word, if you ask me. But I also think it's important to remember that sometimes it's okay to be selfish.

I am a person that needs to learn from my own advice that I give. I constantly look out for my friends and family, making sure that they are happy, disregarding my own happiness. But here's the thing, how can you expect to solve everyone else's problems if you can't even figure out your own? You can't.

You know how on the airplane safety video they always tell you to help yourself first with the oxygen mask and then others? Life is exactly the same way. You can't help someone be happy without being happy yourself.

So that's what I did for my last part of summer. Which is why I neglected my blog. I couldn't bring myself to try to give advice for something that I was personally having a hard time finding. However, I'm happy to report to you, my fellow readers, that I am extremely happy. I was able to find myself the past couple months once again.

I stopped trying crazy hard to find a boyfriend, I focused even more on church than usual and I prepared myself for the upcoming school year. I became a more confident version of myself. I woke up each morning facing myself saying, "Hey you're pretty cool and you don't need to impress anyone but yourself." Rather than the usual, "This is as good as it's going to get." Things got better, dare I say, great! I became even better friends with my wonderful roommate, Robyn, who reminds me to try harder to be better everyday. (Though she might not realize she does it for me, I am so grateful for it.) I walked away from toxic "friends" making my life easier. Bad things and reminders left my life at the same time too. My dating life picked up, and when I say picked up...boy, do I mean picked up. If you know what I mean. (;

Everything seemed almost too perfect which lead to me letting myself wonder if maybe I didn't deserve to be this happy. Honestly, as stuck up and as selfish as it sounds, I deserve to be this happy with life; with my friends, family and school. I have been patient, and the reward has finally come. However, I do realize that I have to keep up what I've been doing the past month and a half in order to keep deserving such happiness.

So take this advice or leave it, but in order to make other's happy, you must find your own happiness first. And no, it will not be easy to find. But as soon as you do, make it last as long as possible. Why? BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT. Bad things shouldn't happen to good people, but they do. But once you get through it, the reward will be so great, you'll forget everything bad that ever happened. And you'll smile. (: